L¥AN On the Making Of ‘MEMENTO MORI’
What was the creative process like for this particular album?
I talked a bit about this in a Wav.Max interview, but making this album meant digging back into how I felt at seventeen and eighteen. I wanted it to face some of the darker times in my life, but with the idea that nothing you go through is a total waste. You screw up, you learn, you grow. If you don’t, you just keep running in circles. I feel like now at the age of twentythree i'm a lot more mature and i feel like i've personally grown a lot since then. So i guess i wanted to also give some advice for others with my songs.
The opener, “SUN GOES DOWN,” is about a broken relationship—when you keep “fighting and making up,” but the sun still doesn’t come back up. It’s a reminder that without real communication, nothing gets fixed. That’s a lesson I had to learn the hard way.
“VICTORY LAP” was the opposite vibe—pure fun. I had David Bowie in the back of my mind the whole time, even if the song sounds nothing like him. People listening won't make that connection at all, but it was definetly hugely inspired by Bowie. Bowie’s one of my biggest inspirations, along with Quadeca and Kanye West. I wanted a Bowie-style guitar feel, a playful Kanye-type sample, some heavy 808s, and a hint of Quadeca and Tyler, The Creator in the synths.
I could talk about every track forever, but honestly the whole process was just exciting. I threw a bunch of sounds and genres together until it felt like something only I could make.
Were there any challenges or breakthrough moments during the songwriting process for 'MEMENTO MORI?'
This album forced me to dive back into some of the hardest parts of my past. “SUN GOES DOWN” is about failed relationships and my lack of communication. “VICTORY LAP” is about cutting off fake friends. “POWER” is pure satire, poking fun at empty rap clichés. “HIMALAYA” is deeply personal, written for friends I lost to suicide.
“4EVER” came out of heartbreak in real time. My ex left, and half an hour later I recorded it raw and angry. “NEED YOU NOW” almost got scrapped for not being strong enough compared to the other songs, but with “KAYLA” it is now one of my most popular songs. “BLOOD ON YOUR HANDS” is often mistaken for a heartbreak track, but it’s really about being bullied, receiving an autism diagnosis, and living with anxiety and depression. To some extent it is also about heartbreak. But it's mainly about the loneliest and darkest times of my life. Recording it broke me! I kept crying through takes because those feelings never really left me. That’s why it’s the most important song I’ve ever made. And that's probably also why you can hear so much emotion in my voice in that track.
The rest of the tracks deal with failure, rejection, and the struggle to hold onto life when you want to let go. Writing them was painful, but it helped me accept my past. Memento Mori means “we’ll all die someday” in Latin and for me it reflects that journey from once wanting death, to finally fearing it, because now I actually want to live.
But to shortly sum it up, it was nothing but challenges. I had to step away at times to work on other artists music because I couldn’t keep putting myself through it. It broke me more than once, but now that it’s finished I can see the beauty in it. It's an album full of painful truths and unexpected moments of happiness.
Can you talk about the recording and production process for 'MEMENTO MORI?'
Recording ‘MEMENTO MORI’ was intense and emotional. Some songs came almost instantly, like “4EVER,” which I laid down right after a breakup, while others, like “BLOOD ON YOUR HANDS,” took much longer because I kept getting overwhelmed by the feelings I was revisiting.
The process involved diving back into my past, reliving heartbreak, loss, and struggles, so it was often draining. But that intensity is part of what shaped the sound and the energy of the album. Each track has its own space and mood, reflecting the emotions behind it, from anger and frustration to sadness and even moments of unexpected happiness.
It was a slow, sometimes painful process, but stepping through it allowed the album to carry both the weight of the hard moments and the beauty of the growth that came from them.
Can you tell us a bit about yourself and how you got started in music?
I began my career as a producer, songwriter, and multi-instrumentalist for other artists. Things truly took off in 2022 when I produced, performed, and wrote the entire EP ‘SPACE’ for Regan Pierce. The project’s first single, “Please Don’t Wake Me Up,” was inspired by a recent breakup and quickly gained momentum earning 20000 streams within two weeks. Today, the full EP is gold certified.
Since then, I’ve collaborated with a wide range of musicians, including Ariana Celaeno, KAYLA, SINCLAIR, B. Griff, Marco Vernice, Honey-B-Sweet, Rydah Ventanni, Fabien Darcy, King Marino, Keybeaux, and many others.
Even while producing for others, I always wanted to create music of my own. For a long time, though, I hesitated. I wasn’t fond of the sound of my own voice. After four or five years of vocal training, I reached a crossroads. Either stop investing in training or start using what I’d learned. That decision led to “4EVER,” my first original track, which now appears as the fifth song on this album.
The album took about two years to complete, with plenty of pauses while I continued producing for other artists. But once “4EVER” was finished, everything clicked. The rest of the songs followed naturally, and I immediately knew the direction this project was meant to take.
Do you aim to convey any specific themes or messages through your music?
Yeah, for me it’s mostly about being real with what I’ve been through. A lot of my songs come from tough stuff such as loss, mistakes, feeling like you’re stuck, but also how you grow from it.
I want people to feel that even the darkest moments can mean something, that you can come out of it stronger. And I try to stay honest and vulnerable, like actually saying the things that's hard to say out loud.
At the end of the day, it’s about accepting where you’ve been and still believing there’s a future worth chasing.
