Michele Braid Topcu: “The Game”
Punk Head: You’ve said this song was about reclaiming your voice, not just in theory, but also in real life. What did that actually require from you, creatively and personally?
Michele Braid Topcu: It required me to go inwards and find the memories that I had spent so long putting to rest. It required peace and a safe space which was the studio to bring forward the painful memories. I spent days and weeks finding sounds that matched a feeling then I worked outwards. It was extremely cathartic.
Punk Head: The orchestral bridge feels like a moment where everything cracks open. Was that emotional arc something you consciously built into the song, or did it emerge as you were writing?
Michele Braid Topcu: It was definitely a part I had thought about putting into the song and the part that took the longest. This was my release and my chance to make something beautiful out of something that was so dark.
Punk Head: You’ve lived on stages built for glamour and spectacle, and now you’re sharing something far more exposed. How has your relationship with being seen and seeing yourself changed over time?
Michele Braid Topcu: its funny but being on all of those stages with all of those celebrities never felt real to me, it was such a rare circumstance i was in when i got asked to join the band that created tocas miracle, i had came from a situation where i had been living in homeless shelters and i had they saw me performing in a nightclub. I left and moved to London and performed all over the world, nothing about it felt like the reality I had experienced so I just took it day by day.
This feels different because I'm the one in charge and it’s all coming from my heart and experience. I don’t care about it being commercial or getting played as much as it would be wonderful it’s more about getting the feelings out of my body and healing.
Punk Head: Turning trauma into art isn’t automatic. Was there a moment when you realized you were finally strong enough to do that work without it breaking you and what helped you trust yourself there?
Michele Braid Topcu: i think its just time, i had started writing a book on my story when i left the band and quickly realised it was still too raw, everytime i put pen to paper i would inevitably end up exhausted for days sometimes weeks, i think music lyrics and art became a better solution for me because at the end i would have something beautiful and not just pain in print.
Punk Head: As you move toward the music video, what parts of this story need to be felt visually rather than explained in words?
Michele Braid Topcu: all of it, all of it needs to be felt, it’s unfortunate that it’s not a rare story but im grateful I can at least try and make something bad that happened to me into something good that hopefully others will understand and if not understand at least enjoy the music
